A few years ago, I did a very good job of tracking all my spending. As my income has increased since that time, I’ve found less value in keeping notes on the ultimate destination of every single cent. I believe that close scrutiny is required when someone is looking for ways to improve their finances, particularly when expenses are close to or exceeding income.

While I sometimes feel like I should be doing a better job at keeping Quicken updated with the latest information on a daily basis, I generally will allow myself more slack with my accuracy.

I came across a poem by Robert Frost that affirms my recent perspective, from The Hardship of Accounting:

Never ask of money spent
Where the spender thinks it went.
Nobody was ever meant
To remember or invent
What he did with every cent.

The original version of this article, Who Said Accounting Isn’t Poetic?, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Back in the late 1980s, I collected baseball cards just like millions of other kids. That’s around the same time that popularity of baseball card collecting skyrocketed and the producers of cards — and Major League Baseball — ruined the hobby, never to recover.

Taking advantage of collector — and even investor — interest, the companies tried to make as much money as possible and increased supply to meet demand. By the early 1990s, there were too many brands of baseball cards producing too many variations and too many prints of each. Card collecting became a chore rather than a fun and exciting exciting. (Plus, like millions of other kids, I was simply getting older and less interested.) Looking to make money on baseball card appreciation, fewer cards were handled and more cards were kept in pristine condition, ensuring that no cards would ever be “rare” in top condition.

Recent;y, I had heard that Major League Baseball finally realized that they had helped ruin the card collecting hobby (with additional help from the public distaste with the sport for a time). They recently cut back the number of baseball card producers to just Topps and Upper Deck. Perhaps, due to limiting the production of baseball cards and the resurgence of the sport, card collecting and trading would become popular again.

As I tried to complete team sets of Mets cards for myself and my girlfriend, not for investment but just because we’re fans of the team, I discovered that not much has changed. It’s true that there are only two companies producing baseball cards, but there are so many variations and sets that keeping track of everything would still be a chore. For example, Topps sells factory-sealed sets for each team. The team sets contain only about 15 cards, but these cards are slightly different from the cards you would find if you looked through the traditional random baseball card packs sold in delis and convenience stores looking for the cards you want.

Here is what it would take the be a true collector presently. If you’re an enthusiast looking to complete just a 2008 collection for one team, not only do you need all the cards from Series 1 and Series 2 featuring players from that team, but you’d need a second 55-card “special edition” team set that includes cards for the managers, coaches, and mascot. You would also need cards from the “Opening Day” series, the “Chrome” series, the “Co-signers” series, the “Finest” series, the “Milestones” series, and the “Heritage” series. Don’t forget that Topps also owns the Bowman brand, so you would need to find the “Bowman” series as well.

Even for kids who spend their parents’ money with reckless abandon, it’s simply too expensive to properly be a child interested in being successful at collecting cards in the traditional manner. You might as well just give up now. I certainly understand why millions of kids have left card trading and collecting behind.

Here’s how to make card collecting popular (and perhaps even profitable) again. Lower the price of baseball cards. Reduce the number of cards in a complete set to fewer than 1,000 for the year. Don’t print as many. Keep investors away. Convince kids that the cards should be traded, handled, and even abused, not placed in pristine holders to be kept in mint condition forever.

The original version of this article, Baseball Cards Aren’t Fun Anymore, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Almost always, exorbitant salaries come with serious responsibilities and high levels of stress. It’s important for your psyche to be able to take a moment a blow off steam.

On Saturday, I was at Shea Stadium to watch interleague baseball between The New York Mets and The Texas Rangers. I purchased tickets a few months ago for this game and six others as part of a seven-game package honoring the last season of play at Shea Stadium.

The weather was horrible but we headed to the stadium, anyway. Thunderstorms and rain persisted, and an hour and a half after the game was scheduled to start, the team finally announced that the game would be postponed and our tickets would need to be exchanged for any other game this season. By the time the game was called, the players on the Mets were likely long gone, back to their clubhouse or perhaps on their way home for the night.

The Rangers however had a chance to blow off some steam. With the tarp covering the baseball infield, a few decided that the pouring rain created the perfect opportunity for a little “Slip ‘N Slide.” I never thought I’d ever hear so many Mets fans chanting, “Let’s go Rangers!”

Here’s what it looked like.

Don’t forget that despite your contracts worth millions, you are still kids, no matter what your age. Act like it once in a while.

The original version of this article, Don’t Forget to Have Fun, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Yesterday, I received five USB flash drives containing the TaxCut software, and I intend on giving each one of these away to Consumerism Commentary readers. Last year, I didn’t receive these flash drives until April 11, a little too late for tax filing purposes. Also, last year’s drives were only 256 MB. The drives I received yesterday have four times the capacity. Even if you’ve already filed your taxes or are using other software, you can still win one of these 1 GB flash drives and erase the data. You can then put music, photos, or any other kinds of computer files on these USB drives.

I’ve never used TaxCut before, so I can’t vouch for the software’s quality. Over the last few years I’ve been using TaxAct, and before that, TurboTaxOnline. TaxCut is a popular product, and I’d suggest reading the CNET Review for pros and cons.

If you’re interested in being selected to win a USB flash drive containing TaxCut Premium Federal + State + e-file, leave a comment below on this post. The comment could be an interesting anecdote about your own tax situation or someone else’s, it could be a joke, or it could be anything else. There are two catches. I’ll only send a drive to a United States address, and you’ll need to include a real email address so I can contact you if you win.

This probably goes without saying, but we’ll only take one submission per person and IP address.

The original version of this article, Giveaway: Five 1 GB USB Flash Drives With TaxCut Software, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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If you don’t own a notebook computer but you still want to write term papers or browse the web from Starbucks, apparently the staff doesn’t mind. Recently, one Starbucks location in New York City was invaded by a few individuals who brought old Windows PCs, monitors included, to do some “work” and film the event for posterity.

It was the latest mission from Improv Everywhere, a group of undercover “agents” who create “scenes of chaos and joy everywhere” (but mainly in New York).

Some Starbucks customers believed these were public computers and stood behind the “agents” waiting for their turn to use the machines.

The Starbucks staff never gave us any trouble at all. In fact, it didn’t seem like it occurred to them that the three computer users might have known each other. One employee walked by me and laughed. I asked him what was going on and he pointed at the three computer users and declared, “They mean BUSINESS…” The manager told me that it must be “midterms” and that they were probably students from FIT, a college across the street… he didn’t put together that we were all part of a prank.

The Improv Everywhere report includes photos and videos of the “mission.”

Mobile Desktop [Improv Everywhere]

The original version of this article, Starbucks Allows You to Bring Your Desktop Computer, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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I have sent an email to five winners of Quicken Premier 2008, provided to me for giving away to Consumerism Commentary readers by Intuit. If you entered the contest, check your email to see if you are a winner. Were you selected? If so, be sure to respond to the email by 8:00 PM Eastern time on Thursday, September 20. If I don’t hear back from those selected first, I will pick new winners.

The original version of this article, Quicken Premier 2008 Winners Have Been Contacted, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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I’m giving away all five copies of Quicken Premier 2008 to commenters who respond to this post, and I’ll be choosing the winners in a little over 24 hours. Click on that link and leave a comment at the bottom of the page in order to be considered in the drawing.

The original version of this article, 24 Hours Remain to Win Quicken Premier 2008, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Once in a while, my friends get together to play Texas Hold ‘Em. It’s not the typical poker situation that you might see in movies. There are no smoke-filled rooms, not a lot of alcohol, and the buy-in for tournament-style play is only $5. Due to some luck, because I certainly don’t have the fine-honed skills, I walked away with $35.

I’ll be using my winnings to pick up a Wii game for my girlfriend who is having a difficult time with her under-performing fourth-graders this year.

The original version of this article, A Winning Night With Poker, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Related: Men Paying for Dinner: Is It More Romantic?.

School’s back in session, work’s ramping up again, and it’s almost time to let go of summer and fully embrace fall. But that shouldn’t mean your romantic life falls by the wayside. From what I’m seeing in the weather reports, it’s supposed to be a nice warm weekend across the U.S., the perfect opportunity to get outdoors and have a really memorable, fantastic date to carry you through the colder months.

The best part? All of these ideas can be done for $30 or less, proving that frugal can still be fun.

1. Private Wine and Cheese Bicycle Tour

If you don’t already have bicycles, chances are there’s a friend or family member not using theirs this weekend who’s willing to let you borrow. You can get a nice bottle of wine for under $10, a crusty loaf of bread for under $5, and cheese, grapes, and perhaps even some olives for the remaining $15. Pack it all up in a backpack with a corkscrew, a knife and some plastic glasses, and you’ve got all the makings of a fantastic day out.

Find a nice, quiet place to cycle — a local park, a scenic area, or even an official bike path. I suggest avoiding cycling near traffic because of the noise factor. You can look up routes near you at your preferred level of challenge at Bikely.com or just use your favorite search engine. As long as there’s a nice place to stop and enjoy your feast, you’re all set. You may want to pack a light blanket to relax on.

2. Canoe for Two

A quick Google search shows a bevy of rental outlets across the U.S. who will rent a canoe or even sometimes a 1 or 2-person kayak starting as low as $8 an hour:

• Canoe on the Red Cedar River on the MSU campus in MI for $8 an hour
• Canoe in Princeton, NJ for $13 (first hour), $6 each additional hour
• Canoe in Boston on the Charles River for $15 an hour
• Canoe in Rochester, NY for $16 an hour
• Canoe in Newport Beach, CA or Collinsville, CT for $20 an hour
• Canoe in Machias, ME for $20 a day
• Canoe a state park in VA for $20 a trip

Pack some sandwiches and fruit in waterproof bags for lunch and you can make a day of it, even if you only spend an hour on the water. There’s lots of opportunity to relax and take in the scenery for free. Make it a double or triple date and you may even qualify for a group discount!

3. The Secluded Beach Getaway

Coastal beach getaways can be prohibitively pricey, but there’s a frugal and possibly more romantic alternative: the lake or recreational/state park “beach”. One such area I’ve personally been to is Penn State Forest in the famous New Jersey Pine Barrens. There’s no entrance fee whatsoever, so for the price of gas and lunch, locals can find a haven in the wilderness with a sandy beach area, picnic tables and the clear, blue swimmable waters of Lake Oswego. You can even get your fill of free wild blueberries, when in season. Bring some chairs or a blanket and swim and sun till dark without fear of a parking ticket.

Spruce Run is another of my NJ favorites — for a $10 entrance fee per car, you can hang out on the beach and watch the colorful sailboats go by, cook out on the provided charcoal grills, or take a dip in the reservoir.

There are lots of public lakes and reservoirs across the country with such amenities, usually for an entrance fee of $10 or less. Here’s a great list of day-use parks in Oregon, most of which are free to enter. Google “state parks” or “reservoirs” in your state and you’re likely to find at least a few special retreats. Share your favorites in the comments — I’d love to discover some more great spots.

4. Hammock Time

So you’re not really up for cycling or paddling, but still want to enjoy the great outdoors with your date? Find a hammock (or borrow someone else’s) and create your own retreat for two.

Dick’s Sporting Goods has a nice 2-person hammock for $29, and OpenTip has one for even less, though you may have luck at your local Wal-Mart or even a yard sale. All you need is some music, lemonade and a relaxed attitude.

5. Pick-Your-Own Date

Apples are just coming into season where I live, but there’s still a wide choice of fruits and vegetables ripe for the picking. For $30 or less, you can get a nice harvest, plus end up with food for the week. PickYourOwn.org offers a terrific state-by-state listing of farms and their seasonal bounties.

After strolling through the fields, head home and have a little Iron Chef-style dinner for two, seeing what kinds of creative dishes you and your date can create with your newly-acquired produce. You might work together on your creations or choose to enjoy a little friendly competition. Who knows — maybe you’ll even invent a great eggplant dessert.

The original version of this article, 5 Romantic Outdoor Day Date Ideas Under $30, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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The contest to win a copy of Complete Real-Estate Investing Guidebook will end tonight at midnight Eastern Time. If you’re interested in receiving this book for free, please state your case here in the next twelve hours.

The original version of this article, Last Chance for Complete Real-Estate Investing Guidebook, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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When I recently reviewed Wall Street Journal Complete Real-Estate Investing Guidebook, I gave the book 9 stars out of 10. (Read the review here.) Filled with incredible detail, this book can serve as a guide for novice real-estate investors. If you read Rich Dad, Poor Dad and found yourself wanting more in the way of concrete information and realistic expectations, this book by the editor of the Wall Street Journal Sunday is a great choice.

I’d like to give away one free copy of this book. Since my copy has been personalized, the giveaway will be a new book shipped directly from Amazon.com. To be considered for this free copy, simply leave a comment on this post. Any stories about failed attempts at real-estate investing would be appreciated.

When you leave a comment, make sure you use a valid email address. I’ll need a way to contact the winner.

The original version of this article, Giveaway: Complete Real-Estate Investing Guidebook by David Crook, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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At 11:59 PM tomorrow night, I will no longer be accepting entries in the giveaway of Cash, Cars, & College, by Janine Bolon. I’m giving away two copies of the book, which I’ve reviewed here, so your chances are still not bad.

In order to be included in the drawing, simply read this post and answer the question. Good luck!

The original version of this article, Final Giveaway Reminder: Cash, Cars, & College, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Earlier this month, I read and reviewed Cash, Cars & College: A Young Person’s Guide to Money, by Janine Bolon, a neat little book touching on some of the important aspects of managing money for a teenager looking to someday become a functioning adult, moreso than the average citizen.

I now have the opportunity to give away two copies of this book, as well as additional surprise goodie or two. To participate in the contest in which I’ll choose the winners is simple. There is no purchase necessary, but I do ask you answer a question and leave a valid email address (so I can contact you if you win). Here is that one question:

What single piece of (financial) advice would you like to tell your thirteen-year-old self if technology afforded you the ability to travel in time and meet yourself without any adverse effects, such as destroying the time-space continuum, and why?

Extra “points” will be awarded for creativity, storytelling, humor, and sincerity. I’ll declare an instant winner if anyone can provide an Aaron Sorkin style script in response. Remember, I have two copies, so while the chances of winning depend on the number of comments, they’re twice as good as they would be if I had only one copy.

The original version of this article, Giveaway: Cash, Cars & College by Janine Bolon, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Thanks to everyone who had suggestions for the next version of Quicken. Now, I’m sure the software architects and programmers don’t read the site, and I’m also sure than Quicken 2008 is just now receiving its final touches in preparation of its release, but there are some great suggestions that one would hope would make it into the 2009 release.

Each commenter on that post — as well as on the reminder the other day — was placed in a virtual hat to participate in a random drawing. The only prize would be a copy of Quicken Premier 2007, provided to me by the Quicken Product Manager at Intuit. Congratulations to Patrick from Cash Money Life, who was randomly picked as the winner!

The software will be going in the mail tomorrow, along with this month’s earlier giveaway, Excuse Me, Your Job is Waiting, by Laura George. This is my first chance to get to a post office in a long time, and I plan on picking up a book of “forever” stamps — but not quite $8,000 worth.

The original version of this article, Congratulations to Patrick, Winner of Quicken Premier 2007, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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As Quicken 2008 will likely be released within the next few months, I have a copy of Quicken Premier 2007 directly from Intuit to give away to a lucky reader. All you have to do is leave a comment on this post, and you’ll be entered twice in the contest. I plan on picking the winner some time this week, so if you haven’t already, feel free to put your name in the hat.

Update: This contest is now closed! The winner will be announced tomorrow. Please feel free to keep commenting and adding your thoughts for Quicken 2008 by visiting this link.

The original version of this article, Reminder: Quicken Premier 2007 Giveaway, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Over a week ago, I held a simple contest in order to give away one copy of Excuse Me, Your Job is Waiting, by Laura George [my review]. To enter the contest, all I required other than a valid email address was a description of your “dream job.” Here are some of the responses.

Congratulations to Sarah, the winner of the contest thanks to a random selection. Here’s her dream job:

I want to tell people’s stories. I want to use my words and my love for people to bring those of different cultures and backgrounds together.

I have two more copies to give away, but I haven’t decided how to do so. I have the opportunity to pass questions from readers to the author, and I can tie the giveaway into the question selection process. Look for more information about this interview next week.

The original version of this article, Congratulations to Sarah, Winner of Excuse Me, Your Job is Waiting, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Earlier this morning, I reviewed Excuse Me, Your Job is Waiting (Amazon link) by Laura George and found it to be a good job-hunting book with advice based on the “law of attraction.” I’m happy to be able to give away the three copies sent to me by the publisher. Read the review, if you haven’t already.

If you’re interested in winning the first free copy, answer this simple (or perhaps not so simple) question:

What is your dream job?

Feel free to elaborate. Are you working your dream job now? How will you get there? The method I use to choose the winner may not be so random — in this case, I like insightful and interesting (and perhaps funny) comments.

The original version of this article, Giveaway: Excuse Me, Your Job is Waiting by Laura George, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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On Sunday, I purchased a Nintendo Wii. It wasn’t for me. My girlfriend, celebrating her thirtieth birthday, wanted the game system as a gift.

Not knowing much about the current state of demand and supply for the game consoles and assuming any frenzy ended with the past holiday season, we went shopping on Saturday. Our first stop was the nearby Toys R Us.

They had none in stock, but there were laser-printed signs all over the store indicating they expected a shipment of Wiis in the next day, in addition to some kind of Pokemon thing. I couldn’t help thinking that this really wasn’t my kind of game.

We stopped into other stores, including Circuit City and Best Buy, but no Nintendos could be found. Best Buy would have them in the next day like Toys R Us, but no one at Circuit City seemed to have any information about their next shipment.

After confirming for the third time that my girlfriend was positive this was what she wanted for her birthday, we decided to head to Toys R Us on Sunday before the store opened.

When we arrived, there was a long line of eager would-be customers waiting at the door. A few people at the head of the line had blankets and chairs. They must have been there for hours, if not overnight. I had no idea demand was still so high for these devices.

As we arrived in line about 30 minutes before the doors opened, a store employee handed us a number (64), which guaranteed us a Wii. By the time the store opened, they were turning people away.

After the line moved inside the store, it still took another half hour before we’d enter the game section of the store and head to the counter to turn in our numbered slip and claim the prize. While in line, the girls behind us (numbers 65 and 66) were on the phone with their friends, talking about whether they could create an eBay account to sell the consoles online to those unable to purchase one in person, theoretically for a nice profit.

These girls were on their way back to Connecticut, saw the line at the Toys R Us, and got sidetracked. While we were on line, one lied to her father on the phone by telling him they had just stopped for coffee and were getting back on the road.

A quick search of eBay reveals that recently auctioned consoles are selling anywhere from $270 to $320 plus shipping. The regular price is $249, so I guess demand is still rather high.

Toys R Us was sold out of the new Zelda game, which I would have liked for myself. The only extra we opted for was an additional controller. Game systems used to come with two controllers, but someone discovered they can make more money by selling them separately.

After getting the system hooked up — we decided not to wait for my girlfriend’s actual birthday next Saturday — we played the bundled sports game. It was interesting, and it took a few times to get used to the motion-sensitive controller. We connected the Wii to the Internet and downloaded a classic NES game, Super Mario Brothers.

That classic game seems to be the winner so far. If you take the Wii’s strange remote-control-looking controller and turn it sideways, it vaguely resembles the original NES controller, and that’s how it is used in the game.

We were discovering “warp zones” I forgot existed, and my girlfriend was able to do that 100-free-lives trick with the turtle guy on the blocks. You know what I’m talking about.

The original version of this article, I Got a Nintendo Wii, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Realizing that it’s a little late for sending these out and filing taxes in time for the standard deadline, I’d still like to give these away.

I have five USB Flash Drives with 256MB storage space. You can find these almost anywhere, and they are inexpensive. These flash drives come with Tax Cut Premium Federal + State. With this software, you can complete your 1040 using the Tax Cut’s interview guide, but there is a fee to e-file.

Considering I’ve already completed my taxes, I’d probably just delete the software and use the drive to move documents back and forth between computers.

Perhaps the software will come in handy if you’ve already filed an extension.

Regardless of what you’d like to use the flash drive for, if you want one of the five I’m giving away, leave a comment here, with a valid email address. If response is good, I’ll pick all five winners from this post. If no one is interested, I’ll just use them for myself.

The original version of this article, Giveaway: Five USB Flash Drives With Tax Cut Software, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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The random comment selector has chosen 2million of My Journey to Financial Freedom to be the winner of the free copy of Quicken Rental Property Manager. Thanks everyone for playing! There were some good comments as well.

Brenda says:

I have 3 rental properties and have been keeping all my books by hand! Ugh!!! Can you imagine the hours this program would save me? I hope to have more properties in the future. I tried using a program called “Saferent” but wasn’t impressed with it. If you choose me as the person to give the gift to and it doesn’t work out for me, I promise to give someone else a go at it. It will not be wasted. Also, if you like, I will let you know if it was helpful to me or if I passed it on.

From Jon K:

I have one rental property now. Just filed my 2006 taxes- the first year to report activity from a rental property. I intend to never sell my residence. In other words, when I decide to move, I want to simply convert my current residence to a rental property. Not sure if that’ll work out, but that’s the plan. I’ve checked out this software in stores before, but I was holding off on buying it. Now that I’m once again in the market for a new home, it might not be a bad idea to have some software to manage my future real estate empire! ;-)

Valerie has this comment about the software:

Rental Property Manager might be OK for anyone who is NOT using Quicken itself. But, as Savvy notes in his review, RPM is very rigid in regard to changing categories, entering prepayments, etc. The big problem for Quicken users is that it is impossible to transfer the data from RPM to Quicken, so if you want a report on your Net Worth, you have to re-enter the data into Quicken. AND you can keep all the same information in Quicken just as well and not need to have a separate program at all.

Robin has a favorable review:

Just to let you know, I do use this software presently for my one and John’s 5 rental properties, and while I probably could have set up an Excel file to do at least some of the tracking for me, this is a much cleaner-looking solution which comes nicely set up. I track all of our income and outlay all year as it happens with this software, then print out all our Schedule E forms simply… One of the best features is that it tracks tenant information, providing nice centralized storage, and even alerts me when I need to update/renew leases…

Again, congratulations to 2million. Stay tuned; I have two more Quicken-related giveaways in the upcoming month or so.

The original version of this article, Congratulations to 2million, Winner of Quicken Rental Property Manager, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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I never thought I’d see the day a song by the “mostly fictional” band Spinal Tap (Gimme Some Money, their first single from “1965″) is used in a commercial for a completely non-fictional product. That day was today. I haven’t found a video online yet of this American Express commercial, but look out for this one on television. It’s a funny song, and a completely random sighting.

Spinal Tap seems to have gone commercial lately, with the guitarist “Nigel Tufnel” appearing in a Volkswagen ad: “This amplifier has airbags!”

Update: Thanks to a commenter, now you can see the commercial online, courtesy of YouTube.

The original version of this article, American Express and Spinal Tap?, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Early tomorrow morning, I’ll be boarding a plane to head out to California for Thanksgiving. I’ll still be posting, but perhaps not as frequently. To hold you over, here are some lyrics from one of my favorite musucians, Ben Folds. It’s about life in suburbia, something which many of us can relate to.

Y’all don’t know what it’s like, watching Idol on a Friday night
In a house built safe and sound on an Indian burial ground, sham on.
We drive our cars everyday to and from work both ways
And we make just enough to pay to drive our cars to work each day, hey hey.

We’re rockin’ the suburbs — around the block just one more time.
We’re rockin’ the suburbs ’cause I can’t tell which house is mine.
We’re rockin’ the suburbs — we part the shades and face the facts.
They got better looking fescue right across the cul de sac.

Hot real estate rising stars, get rich quick seminars.
Soap opera magazines, forty-thousand-watt nativity scenes.
Don’t freak about the smoke alarm –
Mom left the TV dinner on.

We’re rockin’ the suburbs from Downing Mews to Chevy Chase.
We’re rockin’ the suburbs — we numb the muscles in our face.
We’re rockin’ the suburbs — we feed the dog and mow the lawn,
Watching mommy bounce the checks while daddy juggles credit cards.

(William Shatner, the neighbor.) Hi! Sorry to bother you. The name’s Bill, I live just across the street. Yeah, that’s right over there. No, no, not that house, the one next to it with the extra flowerbed. Oh, and here’s all your papers from the last few days. They were just piling up on the driveway where the whole neighborhood can see them. Not that that’s a problem, of course, but that and the grass being a little overgrown might give someone the impression you were out of town, and you wouldn’t want that!

I’ve got to be going shortly to a little class I’ve been attending. I just — no, no, no, no, not pottery or anything like that. It’s uh… an anger management class, actually. And, speaking of that very class they’ve been emphasizing finding some common ground with… people before you confront them, to avoid becoming violent, you know? Well actually we do have a few things in common. Here, could you take these papers? They’re getting my suit wet.

And, as I was saying, we do live on the same cul-de-sac, that’s common ground. And I believe we actually have the same houseplan, except in reverse. Your garage is on the left and mine is on the–

No, it wasn’t me that dialed 911 at 6:31 pm Wednesday about your son’s noisy rock band. Anyway, it’s about your dog. And of course about our garbage, and some of the neighbors’ garbage cans. No, I’m sorry it is your dog who’s been strewing garbage around the block. And I have digital evidence complete with red-eye reduction, which I will email to you to prove that it is in fact your dog.

Now, I have to warn you that I have a black belt in karate, too, and I certainly don’t mind using it if necessary. No, not on you, ma’am, on. your. stinking. DOG!

We’re rockin’ the suburbs, everything we need is here.
We’re rockin’ the suburbs — but it wasn’t here last year.
We’re rockin’ the suburbs. You’ll never know when we are gone
Because a timer lights the pond and turns the cricket noises on,
Each night, yeah yeah.

We’re rockin’ the suburbs, yeah yeah.
We’re rockin’ the suburbs.

The original version of this article, Rockin’ the Suburbs: Y’all Don’t Know What It’s Like, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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If you haven’t noticed, I’m a fan of long post titles. Anyway, as the title says, here are seven ways you can save money while maintaining your extravagant style. After all, isn’t that what everyone wants? The best of both worlds? If you love living beyond your means, follow these guidelines and both worlds will be yours.

1. Eat out regularly. The trick is going to your favorite restaurants without ordering. Walk around from table to table asking strangers, “Are you going to finish that?” Ask while they have food in their mouths; at the fancier restaurants, you’ll have a chance to grab their plate before they swallow and respond.

2. Vacation in Cabo San Lucas. Rather than staying in the swanky resort, stay just outside of town in the poor area. Smuggle some locals back to the United States; you could end up making money on the trip!

3. Lease a Lexus. Charge $50 per person per ride when you drive your family to the park for your kid’s soccer game or your friends out to the bar for a few drinks. Charge $100 per ride after the bar when you have a few drinks in your system. You deserve more reward for the risk.

4. See one Broadway show each week. During the finale, create a nuisance and get ejected from the theater. Demand a full refund.

5. Buy fancy imported water. Get more use out of the special stuff by using it to clean the dishes before drinking. There are ways you can reuse fancy water after drinking, but some may find this option gross.

6. Build a home theater in your basement. Don’t charge for admission, but sell concessions to your friends who visit to watch DVDs and play XBox 360. Start with $500 for popcorn and $1,000 for a small soda. You’ll recoup the cost in 50 years.

7. Buy lots of real estate. It’s easy when you lie to lenders. Then when the banks foreclose, make a big deal about it on a blog. Lots of people will hate you, but AdSense clicks and media attention will start rolling in. Declare bankruptcy and get out of your mess virtually unscathed.

See, it’s rather simple to maintain your extravagant lifestyle while making just a few changes to save some money. Good luck, and let me know how it goes.

The original version of this article, 7 Ways to Save Money While Maintaining Your Extravagant Lifestyle, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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I was doing so well at first on Friday night. A few of my friends got together this weekend to play a little poker, Texas hold ‘em tournament style. I was the chip leader and feeling good for a while, then my friend S. called my bluff and left me destitute. Unfortunately, I never recovered and she went on to win the entire game.

That’s $5.00 down the drain. I guess you could say it was an inexpensive form of entertainment with my friends for several hours. For some reason, I thought we used to play with higher buy-ins, but it’s been a while since I’ve played.

After the poker game, we retired to the basement home theater to play a little of a Tiger Woods golf game on D.’s Xbox 360.

If I had one of these things, I’m afraid I’d spend too much time playing games.

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Here’s a caption contest. What is United States president George W. Bush saying in this speech? Perhaps it is about the economy, but perhaps not. Leave your photo caption in the comments below. The winner, judged arbitrarily by me, gets a cookie.

Fine print: no transference of baked goods, including but not limited to cookies, will be permitted through Consumerism Commentary. Flexo reserves the right to eat such baked goods if he gets hungry.

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My weekend, spent in New York with my girlfriend, was a little expensive. No, we didn’t crash in a Manhattan hotel, nor did we see a Broadway show. All of our time was spent in Queens. On Satuday morning, without any plans for the weekend yet, we decided to be spontaneous. Here’s what we decided to do at the last minute.

She and I decided since the Los Angeles Dodgers, the leaders in the National League West, were in town we should see them play our favorite team, the leaders of the National League East, the New York Mets.

We purchased tickets online and decided that rather saving money and getting “cheap” seats like we normally do, we’d go for the “best available.” Surprisingly, on the morning of a significant game, a pair of great seats by first base were available. They were $60 a piece, but we both had money saved up for “fun.”

We printed the tickets from her apartment and noticed something I had never seen before on a ticket. In a box, partially obstructed by some other information, was a line stating that each ticket was valid for one admission to the Diamond Club.

I had never been to the Diamond Club before, so it sounded like something we would have to try once. (It also sounded like something that would have us spending even more money.) As we were waiting for the train to take us to the stadium — we’d be crazy to drive with the U.S. Open going on in the same vicinity and construction for the new stadium taking place in the parking lot — I noticed some fine print on the ticket stating appropriate casual attire (no t-shirs, etc.) is required for admission to the Diamond Club.

We decided, despite our being underdressed, we would check out the scene to see if we could get in. Once we arrived, getting into the Diamond Club was no problem. We found some seats in the Grill Room, ordered some food from the slow waitress (who at one point informed us that she was having a bad day because they keep giving her more tables and she hadn’t had a chance to pee), and waited for the start of the game.

The servings were a bit larger than we expected, but that worked out in our favor. We had the leftovers wrapped up and we brought them to our seats in the stadium. At least there was no need to buy junk food throughout the game; we just ate the remaining chicken fingers and French fries.

The Diamond Club experience was fun, but probably something I won’t do again (unless someone else is paying). Also, we had the good fortune of choosing the only Mets vs. Dodgers game in the four-game series that was enjoyable, unless you’re a fan of slaughters.

I’m happy that I’m in a financial position where I don’t need to pinch every penny and extract all the fun out of my life. A few years ago, when I was struggling with a $28,000 salary and living, working and tax expenses adding up to a number higher than that amount, there’s no way I could have included a major league baseball game in my “budget.”

By the way, I enjoy minor league games as well. All the seats are great, and you’re up close to the players. The tickets cost much less, the food costs somewhat less, and the games are still enjoyable. The disadvantages are that you don’t get to see superfans, you’ve never heard of the players, and occasionally, you feel like your high school team — or even Little League team in some cases — can beat them.

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Here’s another caption contest. What do you imagine is going on between Warren Buffett and Kelli Swanson? Leave your photo caption in the comments below. The winner gets a cookie.

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Here are Bill Gates and Bill Clinton, both smirking. Let’s see some creativity in the comments below and add a caption to this intimate photograph.

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So far, I think Jim is the leader in the first caption contest, but as we’re taking entries ad infinitum, you will never miss your chance to play along.

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Give this photograph a caption in the comments below. What is Ben Bernanke saying?

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Over a year ago, I switched from Microsoft Money to Intuit Quicken for managing and recording my personal finances. I wouldn’t call myself a fanatic of either software. Neither one is perfect and does everything the way I want.

There are people out there who are Quicken fanatics. According to one site, there is a separate genus and species for these creatures: Quickenheadus neuroticus. Q. neuroticus is identifyable by these traits (or neuroses). That website also provides a handy guide to determine whether you qualify as Q. neuroticus. Here are two examples:

For every airport parking or pay phone expense, you properly enter the city and airport name as the payee and you try to remember the names of the merchants you buy coffee and newspapers at.

You split the “Guns” category into “Guns:Accessories”, “Guns:Ammo” and “Guns:Guns” and you don’t even have a gun.

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If you were concerned, it looks like Barbaro, a Kentucky Debry-winning horse that competed in the Preakness Stakes, is faring well after his surgery. Apparently his long-term prospects are less certain; the article gives Barbaro a 50% chance of surviving. I don’t like those odds.

The strapping 3-year-old colt sustained “life-threatening injuries” Saturday when he broke bones above and below his right rear ankle at the start of the Preakness Stakes. His surgery began around 1 p.m. Sunday, and it wasn’t until some eight hours later that Richardson and trainer Michael Matz emerged to announce that all had gone well.

This article describes the surgery.

Until he was injured, Barbaro earned nice money this year, totalling more than $2 million. He was expected to take the Triple Crown. Experts thought it would be a good idea to bet against the horse, citing an expected bounce, his time off, or better luck for other horses, but some maintained it would be better to bet for Barbaro. Those who took the long bet against the horse should be happy, but hopefully they wished their win was under different circumstances.

Personally, I don’t have enough extra money to gamble on things I cannot control.

The original version of this article, Good and Bad for Barbaro After Preakness and Surgery, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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My video-game-playing friends must be hoping this is a hoax or a tease. The new Sony PlayStation 3 will reportedly cost $499 or $599, depending on the size of the included hard drive. It certainly comes packed with features:

The PlayStation 3 is powered by the “Cell” processor, which Sony boasts makes the machine 35 times more powerful than the PlayStation 2. It will support Blu-Ray storage devices, which hold significantly more data than today’s DVDs, as well as seven wireless controllers, and has outputs for two high-definition televisions (HDTVs). The PS3 will also offer a free online network.

I’ll be skipping this one. I’d waste too much time playing video games. The last video game console I owned was the Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) which I received when I was 9 or 10 years old. About once a year I download a NES emulator, load up The Legend of Zelda, and play through several of the adventures.

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Here’s what was printed on a slip of paper I found inside my Chinese food fortune cookie:

A friend in the market is better than money in the purse.

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When I was your age, sonny, I could go to the pictures for $5.25.

CNN Money takes a look at money in the movies. They take some classics like Midnight Cowboy, Psycho, and Austin Powers and evaluate prices for services or products mentioned in the films, and determine how much the same would cost in 2006 due to inflation. The author then determines if the price is a good deal in today’s terms.

Here are some hints:

* The bounty to kill Jaws is a bargain.
* The hotel in Psycho is overpriced.

The original version of this article, Inflation In The Movies, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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That’s the advice of the decade, isn’t it? Well, it’s also a pretty funny Saturday Night Live skit with Steve Martin. The skit’s a parody of those book infomercials for financial products we see all the time. Looking a little deeper, it’s also a slight commentary on the marketing of common sense.

Well, I saw the clip linked on It’s Your Money, but to view the video hosted on Salon, the viewer is required to watch a short advertisement and have Apple Quicktime.

Here’s a more accessible version of the skit, hosted on YouTube (and therefore probably unauthorized), and requiring only Flash player.

The original version of this article, Don’t Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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According to a survey of more than 1,000 adults, financial responsibility is more important to a lasting relationship than sexual compatibility. For both men and women, sex ranked last when compared to faithfulness (#1), honesty (#2), financial responsibility (#3), and sense of humor (#4).

Financial troubles ranked even higher when people were asked what situations put the most pressure on relationships. Problems paying bills tied with in-law troubles as the top sources of stress.

From this, I conclude that managing your finances well leads to better sex. As you and your partner achieve financial responsibility together, the survey shows the link to strong relationships, and with strong relationships come better sex.

The original version of this article, Financial Responsibility More Important Than Hot Sex, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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I haven’t had much to write about lately. I’ve been quite busy at work and with school work. The good news is I should be finished with my master’s degree in September. There have been some good and some bad aspects of my program, and I plan on giving it a lot of attention on the blog, following commencement.

Now, I’d like to run with the meme (from AllThingsFinancial, Chrees’ World, My Open Wallet, Financial Train Wreck, and Stop Buying Crap) and answer the Viking call, “What’s in your wallet?”

For a while I stopped using a wallet, and kept only the essentials in a small credit card case and a money clip. It was kind of frustrating, so I switched back to a wallet. I’ve managed to stuff quite a bit in there without it getting huge. I keep it in my coat mostly, as keeping the wallet in my pants pocket gets uncomfortable.

Here’s what I have:

* Driver’s license
* AAA card (I’m a member of AAA Plus, and every year it has paid for itself in service)
* Health and dental insurance cards (Aetna)
* Citibank Dividend Platinum Select credit card
* Wachovia debit card
* Two back-up credit cards (I can’t imagine I’d ever need them)
* Wegmans shopping card for grocery discounts
* Borders reward card — I bought a lot of gifts this past holiday season there
* Three (do I need this many?) Metrocards for the New York subway system
* Two frequent customer cards at Blimpie — I don’t eat there anymore
* Assorted receipts (gas, groceries, check deposits)
* $49 in cash

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Somehow I managed to get on the mailing list for AARP, the Organization Formerly Known As The American Association Of Retired Persons But Now Known By Acronym Only. I probably put down a fake date of birth on an unrelated website that asked me for my age many years ago, and now every few weeks I get junk snail mail from the organization courting my imminent membership.

The mailings offer me all sorts of protection with no necessary medical exams. Perhaps I should hold onto the junk for twenty years (you just have to be 50 or older), because they may change their policies in the mean time. I will always have the “But it says on my application…” excuse.

I’d be worried if in twenty years organizations still accept paper applications through the postal service.

The original version of this article, Apparently I’m Retiring Soon, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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I hope everyone has a happy holiday! There are many, many things I’m thankful for. Sure, it’s great to have a job and have money coming in. Most importantly, I’m thankful for the wonderful, supportive people I’ve met online through this blog as well as through my other blogs. I met my girlfriend through one of my websites, and I’m happy, but surprised, she’s put up with me for so long. I’m also thankful for my wonderful familiy.

But this is a blog about personal finance, not touchy-feely… feelings. The topic for Thanksgiving Day is inflation, and if you check the television, you’re bound to see and hear about monster inflation today. I’ve posted some evidence of monster inflation which you will see if you continue reading this blog entry.

(It’s an inflatable Super Grover float from last year’s parade.) Happy Thanksgiving!

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I hope everyone’s having a great weekend!

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Here’s something to pass the time while we await the Fed’s announcement of a quarter-point rate hike. A few years ago, there was a meme that traveled from blog to blog whereby the author searched Google for the phrase “name is” (where name was the author’s name). The results were, of course, posted to his or her blog.

Digging up the meme from the grave, let’s find out what “consumerism is.” (Note: you must include the quotation marks when performing your own something is search.)

Consumerism is a term used to describe the effects of equating personal happiness with purchasing material possessions and consumption.

Rampant mass consumerism is so evil. Hey, can I have a sip of that Frappucino?

Consumerism is what emerges when we are duped into having desires that we would not normally have.

The consumer class needs to be provided with the necessary information for them to begin publicly challenging the notion that consumerism is the only way to live.

Capitalist Consumerism is Destroying Us.

Consumerism is the myth that the individual will be gratified and integrated by consuming.

Consumerism is economically manifested in the chronic purchasing of new goods and services, with little attention to their true need, durability, product origin or the environmental consequences of manufacture and disposal.

The bottom line: Consumerism is working in these plans, with costs moderating while maintaining access to needed care, including preventive and chronic care treatments.

I thnk that’s enough.

The original version of this article, Fun With Google: Consumerism Is…, is copyrighted by Consumerism Commentary.

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Whether or not there exists a housing bubble, t-shirthumor.com stands to win with a hot t-shirt design that’s affordable for any over-extended homeowner facing foreclosure.

The design is a box of “Mr. Housing Bubble” soap with a “Free Balloon Mortgage Inside” and a tagline inviting you to take a bath in the real estate market. Mr. Bubble warns us that if he pops, we’re SCREWED.

The popularity of the shirt (and the various similarly logo’d items) has drawn the ire of the Realty Times newsletter with an article that begins:

Constant talk about a housing bubble could single-handedly cause housing prices to moderate or dip, as the financial press attempts to worry the nation into shifting its money from real estate back into stocks.

There seems to be enough chatter on both sides of the debate to warrant more confusion and no clear changes in the housing market for a while, but someday, someone will look back on their predictions and be right, and someone will look back and realize they were incorrect.

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I couldn’t agree more with the Anne Fisher. According to her article in Fortune, she despises business buzzwords.

I’m all for the malleability and transformation of the English language, but for some reason I cringe when I hear certain phrases. I understand that with the use of any jargon, it’s just a case of individuals attempting to identify with a group (in this case, businesspeople or motivational speakers), most of the time the phrases aren’t even used correctly.

Here are Annie’s doubleplusungood phrases that I, also, happen to find coarse and vulgar:

* bottom line, when not referring to a financial statement and meaning conclusion
* no-brainer
* going forward
* touch base
* win-win
* core competencies
* mission-critical

Now, some of mine:
* value-added
* rightsizing
* utilize (the word you meant to utilize is use.)

Any others to add? In the mean time, play Business Buzzword Bingo.

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Here’s something fun for Friday. The Retail Alphabet Game gives a player the alphabet, with each letter coming from a different brand logo. See if you can guess the brand belonging to the letter. Note that the only official way to receive a clue is to buy one from the author.

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Scott Adams, creator of the comic strip Dilbert and holder of an MBA from Berkeley, wrote a “book” on personal finance, and is summarized today on The Motley Fool. Adams boils personal finance down to nine points, which you will see if you read the article.

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