I came across this today:

Whatever the reason, experts say that at our core, there’s one reason we find wealthy men attractive: instinct. Women, research shows, rank the ability to provide as the most important quality when selecting a mate. Men, not surprisingly, prize a woman’s looks and youthfulness over her other qualities, because those are indicators of fecundity. It’s all about finding the best person to breed with.

As it turns out, we’re all just slaves to our prehistoric urges, even in an era when none of those millenniums-old rules would seem to apply…

A 2006 study done through the University of Chicago shows that men who post online profiles indicating income of $250,000 a year generate significantly more contacts (up to 151% more) than those who make under $50,000…

The article continues to say that the relationships formed between wealthy men and younger, beautiful women start off great but aren’t made for long-term relationships. So here are a few questions. Do you believe money is a turn-on? Can long-term relationships be formed with a disparity in wealth?

Is Money an Aphrodisiac?, Kris Frieswick, MSN Money, July 4, 2008

About the author: This is a guest article written by Dorian Wales, a 30-year-old economist with an MBA in finance. Dorian writes frequently on his own blog, The Personal Financier.

Most common investment mistakes are deeply rooted in psychology. Many of these mistakes can be avoided by allowing another person to take part in the process and by giving this person’s opinions and believes an equal weight in decisions taken.

This person could be an investment broker, a financial planner or a trusted friend. However, who is more appropriate and worthy to take part in such sensitive and significant decisions than your life partner?

At first, some might flinch at the thought of an inexperienced or unprofessional person suddenly participating in a process that clearly requires a certain level of understanding and proficiency. Others might claim a spouse has a right to affect the financial decisions of the household.

I believe both arguments hold certain truths. However, I intend to show how allowing another to take part in the financial decision process, more specifically when it comes to investments, common mistakes can be significantly reduced or avoided at all.

Furthermore, a deeper and more intimate relationship has a better chance at avoiding these mistakes due to the mutual respect and understanding between the two partners. This mutual respect will ensure both opinions are heard and decisions will be made together.

As I’ve already stated most common investment mistakes are deeply rooted in psychology. Some mistakes are a result of over-optimism and success-oriented planning. Others are a result of our innate inability to recognize our own mistakes (or success at times).

The following are three general common investment mistakes and how they can be significantly reduced or avoided by allowing your significant other in the decision process:

1. Planning for the wrong investment time frame. Many investors don’t understand their true time horizon, when you plan to need and liquidate your funds, and plan for either shorter or longer periods of investment. Getting the investment time frame wrong usually ends in loss as a result of either not taking enough risk or taking too much risk accordingly.

Deciding on your investment time frame with your partner may produce surprising results. Perhaps you think you will wait five years before having your first child; it’s possible your future wife has other plans. You may suddenly discover your husband isn’t as happy at work as you thought, and he is contemplating a career change requiring higher levels of liquidity.

Communication is an essential part of living together and it is also, therefore, an essential part of your mutual financial planning.

2. Acting on impulse. Whether investing based on trends or on hot tips, selling at the wrong time, or making all-or-nothing decisions, every investor has been there. Every investor makes his share of mistakes. I believe we all had wished someone could have whispered a word of warning in our ears or had calmed us down before we made those hasty and costly decisions.

Another person actively taking part in the decision process acts as a voice of reason. Simply taking the time to consult will often be enough to prevent yet another spontaneous and costly decision.

On a more humorous note, imagine your wife after you’ve just told her about a great stock tip you got from a friend. One sour face and an “I don’t like him” just might cause you to forget you had ever thought about buying shares in that great bio-tech company you heard about.

3. Lack of self discipline. Two people have more discipline than just one. One individual constantly rationalizes reality to suit his wants and needs, convincing himself of certain scenarios and reasons and acting on them only to find reality backfiring on him.

Two people ground and anchor each other. If you’ve ever trained with another person you must know how harder it is to quit or give up on yourself.

Your significant other can help you stand fast against deviating from your goals and prior decisions. This is important when making investing decisions because constant buying or selling is costly in commissions and lost returns.

Naturally, there are many particular investment mistakes which could be classified under these three groups or any other generic list of mistakes. The important message I’ve tried to relay is that your partner is invaluable in the decision-making process.

A less known fact is that women are better investors than men. If you need proof just think about your TV watching habits, constantly zapping between stations (stocks?) never really making the most of a single show.

Consulting with your partner adds value, even if it’s a psychological message rather than professional advice. Who knows? They might like it and turn advisory skills into a profession or a serious hobby.

If you enjoyed this article, please visit The Personal Financier for more thoughts about investing wisely and economic trends from Dorian’s point of view. We would appreciate your comments and reactions, so if you would like to contribute to the discussion, add your comment below.

How soon into a relationship should you disclose your financial condition, if at all? A wealthy woman wrote a letter to the editor of Money Magazine recently to explain that she does not want to let her new boyfriend, a relationship with the potential to get serious, that she has money. She is wondering whether it’s ethical to keep this information from her boyfriend or whether there’s a point at which she should let him know of her wealth.

The magazine’s editors did a good job of answering the question, and I agree with their conclusions. If a relationship becomes serious and marriage is a possibility, there should be no secrets. This particular woman was hurt by a former boyfriend who “used her for her money” once he discovered that it was possible to do so. That should be an immediate signal that this was not the right guy for her, but it should not scare anyone away from being truthful about money in general. You do have to make a judgment call to determine the right time for approaching the subject. It’s probably not appropriate if you’re on the first few dates, but if you’re starting to pick out rings or talk about living together, I don’t see how these decisions can be made without full financial disclosure.

Commenters who left their opinions below the Money Magazine article are divided. Some have very strong opinions in favor of not telling the boyfriend until the last possible minute. Some think they should discuss money as soon as they decide that the relationship is “serious.” But what is “serious?”

My questions are more specific: Should financial disclosure happen only after a couple decides to get married? Would this prevent money and the attitudes about wealth from affecting relationship decisions, or would it create the possibility for unhealthy surprises later? Should financial information, particularly if that information sets you apart from the average joe or jane, remain protected for as long as possible?

My girlfriend, A., reads Consumerism Commentary, so she can find details about almost every penny I earn and spend. I do have a special account set aside which I call “The A. Fund,” included in my savings totals. In order to allow the occasional surprise, I don’t provide her with details about that money. However, if she looks at my monthly reports, she could get a good idea of what I can and cannot afford in general. Not all relationships include someone who posts their finances in public, though.

What would you do or what do you do? Feel free to post a comment anonymously if you’re worried your significant other may read.

Image source: prozacblues
[Money Magazine: I don’t want to tell my boyfriend I’m loaded]

This is a question mainly for readers in a relationship in which finances are mostly combined or you rely on one another for income and make spending decisions together. I am wondering how much you can spend—whether as a percentage of a total budget or a hard dollar amount—without discussing the details with your significant other. Do you hide any spending from your spouse or partner? (Don’t worry, you can answer anonymously.)

Perhaps you each knowingly keep some separate funds to surprise one another, but I’m more concerned with the little things that may go unnoticed. Can this type of deception be harmful? If so, at what limit would it hurt you or your partner?

Also, do you have or would you consider having a secret bank account? If so, what is it used for?

Ginger is a fashionista in her late 20s—a wife and graduate student striving to have it all. She wrote this article for Consumerism Commentary, but Ginger also publishes the blog Girls Just Wanna Have Funds, and you can subscribe to the blog’s RSS feed here.

Let me preface this by stating that I am not suggesting that women marry solely for money, I am after all a believer in love and commitment as a solid foundation for marriage. However, I am suggesting that women who marry partners that are financially savvy, motivated by money and have aligned views about their attitudes to money, are indeed smarter than their counterparts who don’t when choosing a life partner. I will detail the benefits of choosing a partner that has a solid financial plan in place and uses money as a tool and not a crutch.

Financially Savvy

Women who choose financially savvy partners fare better than their counterparts who don’t. Why? These women know that in order to have a marriage built to last that finances play a huge role in the viability of the marriage. I know it sounds like we’re discussing a corporate merger but bear with me; after all, marriage in some respects is like a business.

1969 Inc., said it best when asked for her insights to marriage,

It’s like running a corporation. A business venture. You have to go into it knowing that it could fail or it could succeed beyond your wildest dreams and make you rich… If the employees don’t share the vision, believe in the vision and work together, the endeavor will fail. Some businesses will get rich. Some will barely make ends meet. Some will never make a dime. The money does not measure success. The sense of accomplishment will come from the daily struggle… the love of what you do, working together day in and day out.

The reality is that personal finance issues are the leading cause of divorce and in order to live happily ever after, you must be on the same page as far as your finances are concerned. No, if, ands or buts about it. Capisce?

So what makes these women smarter?

Aligned Financial Values

When smart women meet a partner, they aren’t wooed by good looks and the smooth talk, after all those come a dime a dozen. These women are looking at how their potential partners spend money. Does he have an emergency fund? Is he current on their monthly bills such as the car payment and rent/mortgage? Does he spend more than he earns? They’re listening keenly to understand how their potential mates relate to money. Is it a tool? Is it a crutch? They know the difference and conduct business accordingly. Should the potential mate fall into the category of the above mentioned then it’s time to say good-bye. After all, who wants a man who isn’t interested in learning how to manage his money effectively? They are in it for the long haul, not a few cheap dates.

Motivated by Money to Create the Life They Want

Smart women are up to date on the latest issues in personal finance. They understand rate chasing, investing for the long haul and understand that while they may have substantial savings, practice and embrace frugality. They look for similar if not the same qualities in their potential mates. Smart women want to be able to relate not only on a romantic level, but also on issues regarding personal finance.

A Man with a Plan

Who wants a man with no financial plan in place? I certainly don’t. Where does he see himself in 2 years? 5 years? 10 years? Is he thinking long or short term? That answer will determine the course of the relationship. Ideally he should be able to think past next month’s car payment and project how much he will have in his savings account by year’s end. This an expectation for smart women, not a hope or a dream, but something they demand and require in a potential mate.

Take a few minutes to let it all sink in. Gone are the days when gold diggers were secretly envied because they were able to go for the gusto and stifle high pitched screams during musty sex with a shriveled up oil tycoon. Move over and make way for women who are in control of their financial destinies and not afraid to say it. They are armed with a positive net worth and not afraid to flaunt it.

Are you a smart woman?

If you liked this article, read more from Ginger at Girls Just Wanna Have Funds.